It's time to shake things up around here. Burlesque is not just about the ladies ... well, the important parts are ... but there are some dudes on the scene as well. So fasten your seat belts, because you're about to meet ...

GARY SHAPIRO

photo by Chris Beyond, swiped from Gary's MySpace site.

(hint: he's the one in the middle.)

Gary Shapiro is a nut. Fortunately, Gary is in one of the few fields where calling someone a "nut" is a compliment. If you recall from the last one of these things, the first L.A. burlesque show I attended was Victory Variety Hour's Super Nova a-go-go, which was hosted by Msr. Shapiro. That night, he set the bar for what I expect from a burlesque host.

Because, you see, Gary Shapiro is also a comic genius. His sense of humor is pointedly dark at times, and he gets away with saying the most horrible things. His delivery is such that you know that he knows what he's doing. So there's safety with Gary, even when he's careening dangerously around taboo subjects. That safety creates the space in which we laugh.

But enough dry, logical analysis. Let's watch a video. This is definitely not safe for work:


Another thing about Gary -- and this is just delightful -- for me he recalls the great Jewish comics of the past. There's a showmanship there that reminds me of those guys: Jack Benny, George Burns, Jackie Mason, Jerry Lewis, et al. There is a richness of American culture that we are missing in this day and age. I mentioned something about this when I wrote about Lili VonSchtupp back in June. There's a classiness about Gary, a professionalism that elevates his strictly-for-adults comedy to the level of art. When I say Gary reminds me of the greats, that's what I mean.

Gary Shapiro can typically be found hosting Victory Variety Hour at the El Cid, unless you're a process server, in which case I hear Gary moved to the Caymans. So good luck with that. You can read his bio and see a picture of his son at Burlesque411.com, or read his insightful and ponderously philosophic blog on MySpace. But you should really catch his act live!

Book Review:

Historic Photos of Los Angeles
text and captions by Dana Lombardy

I've heard it said that converts are the most devout. You have seen this old saying in practice if you've ever caught Huell Howser's local PBS shows, and heard him gush over "California's Gold" in his Tennessean accent. I know it to be true in my own life, as every year that passes since Pamela and I moved here, Los Angeles feels more and more like home.

For me, turning the pages of Historic Photos of Los Angeles feels like I'm cracking open a grandparent's photo album. Just like those photo albums, I see pictures of Los Angeles when she was younger, and I marvel at how many of the main features are the same -- she's recognizable, parts of her, a hundred years ago -- and I'm curious about what life must have been like for her, astonished at all the wonders she's seen.

Yes, I'm talking about a town. what can I say? I'm devout.

This collection of photographs, many of them by amateur photographers through the decades, paint a picture of a vibrant city. A city with problems, a city sprawling out of control, but a city full of life and ambition. There are the shots of prominent architectural features back when they were new, and it can give the reader a warm shot of nostalgia to look at these pictures (I got one such shot when I turned the page and found a 1920s photo of the Bullock building on Wilshire Boulevard near Vermont; I drive past this building every day), but this book offers much more than a tour of famous structures.

The photos represent moments in time, spanning from the late 19th century to the 1960s. There is much history between these covers. Sure, the development of the film industry is well represented, but so to are the 1932 Olympics, World War II, and the Watts riots. In his preface to the book, Dana Lombardy reveals an effort to offer a balanced picture of Los Angeles, rather than "a nostalgic tribute to a beloved city." He points out that over the past century, many writers have presented a negative view of the city. "These writers' words," Lombardy tells us, "and the photos in this book, combine to create a fascinating, if not always favorable, portrait of America's second largest city."

There are a couple of problems with the book. First, there's no index. With all of the history and photographs present in this book, a way to quickly track down a particular photograph is not just necessary, it should be an obvious thing to include. Second, all of the photos are presented in black and white, although many of the source photographs (particularly for the last few decades) must have been in color.

Historic Photos of Los Angeles is a wonderful chronicle of our city. Sure it's not always pretty, but family histories rarely are. Like any good history book, this volume gives us a context from which to view Los Angeles as she stands today. If you love Los Angeles, warts and all, you'll love this book.

Historic Photos of Los Angeles, text and captions by Dana Lombardy, published by Turner Publishing Company. Available at bookstores and online.

(I am way behind on my commitment to one post a week. By my count, I need to do five of these things this week to catch up. So let's get to it.)

These little weekly postings are not intended to be thorough reviews. The whole purpose of the "Artists I Love" series is to feature "artists who inspire me, who challenge me, and who make me want to be a better artist myself." It's not my intention to write in depth analyses of these artist, but rather to touch upon aspects that "inspire me," etc.

I have to state my limitations very clearly, for this week's artist is truly a Jane-of-all-trades. I'm simply going to leave things out! It's an inevitability, when addressing a protean talent such as ...

Penny Starr, Jr.photo by Crazy White Lady Photography, swiped from Penny Starr Jr.'s MySpace profile

The first real burlesque show I ever went to in Los Angeles was Penny's Victory Variety Hour. It was the sci-fi show, "Super Nova-a-go-go," almost a year ago:

Ah ... memories.

There is something Thomas Jefferson once said: "Determine never to be idle ... It is wonderful how much may be done if we are always doing." I don't believe Penny Starr, Jr. has an idle bone in her body. She never seems to stop. What's more, she maintains poise and grace while facing deadlines, producing wildly diverse shows, dealing with production difficulties, hosting, dancing ... She's the embodiment of everything I love about theatre people, and she has a drive that I envy.

Penny really is the whole package put together. This is most apparent to me when I watch her dance. First we have the unifying concept behind the act. With Penny, I perceive a combination of a literate wit and a dirty mind. I love her Isadora Duncan number. Penny portrays the doomed early 20th century icon, who was strangled to death when her long, flowing scarf got entangled in the spokes of an automobile. The music is period perfect, the choreography revels in Duncan's dance. The striptease is coy and sexy, and the end of the act is perfection.

Next we have the costume. She builds what she wears on stage, and she is a costumer par excellence. From my unique vantage point as luckiest man in the world -- that is to say, husband to a burlesque dancer -- I have had the pleasure of seeing Penny at work, chatting with her about her theory of rhinestone deployment, and observing her costumes up close. From the cheap seats, you sometimes can't tell the amount of detail and loving care that someone has put into a costume. I'd say with Penny's onstage wardrobe you can, precisely because of the amount of detail and loving care present.

Finally, the whole thing put together. Here, watch another video (from Lucha Va Voom):


Better yet, catch her act live!

Penny (a.k.a. Augusta) produces two shows monthly: the aforementioned Victory Variety Hour ("L.A.'s own 'High Fallutin' Low Brow' variety show) and Club Schmutzig ("A Dark, Dirty Den of Bygone Debauchery.") You can follow her performance schedule on MySpace, and Burlesque411.com.

If you're interested in this whole "New Burlseque" scene, I highly recommend her excellent documentary The Velvet Hammer Burlesque.

I owe you what, three "Artists I Love: Burlesque Edition" posts?

I do apologize. I'm working overtime this week to wrap up a draft of Pin-Up Girls.

(Pin-Up Girls is a World War II-era play about burlesque dancers in San Francisco. I'll be bringing it to the stage this October for Theatre Unleashed.)

My Big Burlesque Debut

"They're doing a Tarantino night at Monday Night Tease. What should I do?"

"We could do the twist contest."

And just like that, I committed to my burlesque debut:

What do you think -- did we nail it?

No "Artists I Love:Burlesque Edition" this week. I'm finishing up a second draft of my play Pin-Up Girls. So look for a "Twofer" next week!

HA!!!!

Spotted on Urban Dictionary:

Here is your second helping of "Artists I Love" this week. Last time the featured artist was Vixen Violette, one of the first burlesque dancers I ever took note of. This time it's one of the latest performers who was captured my attention, the lovely and exotic ...

Lulu Lunaris

photo by Bobby Plasencia, swiped from his Flickr site.

Before there was burlesque, there was bellydance. At least that was the case around Casa de Moore. Before she was Red Snapper, our favorite strawberry blonde striptease artist was known as "Melita" and danced with a local bellydance troupe. That foray into exotic dance was to be but a whistlestop on the way to bigger and more rhinestoney things, but for a short while there I got to hang out with bellydancers and check out that whole scene (and what a scene it is! Note to self: revisit the Perfume of Araby Bellydance Swap Meet sometime!)

There is a natural and historic overlap of bellydance and burlesque. They're not the same artform, to be sure, but it is no surprise to find bellydancers who have migrated to burlesque. One such performer is Lulu Lunaris, who offers a compelling fusion of the two styles with an emphasis on the exotic.

There are performers who excite an audience and bring on the hoots, hollers and applause. There are still others who seem to hypnotize an audience, and perhaps don't generate the same level of vociferous response. I would put Lulu in this latter category. The effect she creates is dazzling; watching her is like watching a tongue of fire dancing atop a candle. Mesmerizing. Her beauty and confidence as a performer contribute to this effect -- one understands how a Salome could convince a king to kill a prophet.

Last Monday night she brought a bit more of the burlesque to her act, as she performed a solo homage to the Robert Rodriguez film Desperado. This number had more of a flamenco influence to it, in costume as well as choreography, and it got me to thinking. There is a tremendous amount of charm inherent in folk dance, and it doesn't matter if it's bellydance, flamenco, square-dance or that German shoe-slapping-dance (it's called "schuhplattler" in case you're wondering).

In addition to being an accomplished hypnotist, Lulu is a charming performer.

You can catch Lulu Lunaris at the Monday Night Tease on July 28th and at Shimmy & Shake on August 24th. Her performance schedule can be found on her Burlesque 411 page.

This week's "Artists I Love: Burlesque Edition" is coming at you in a one-two punch. (Since I missed last week, I figure I owe you, the reader, a "li'l sump'en-sump'en.") Let me tell you, I'm super-stoked about this first one. She's one of the very first burlesque performers I took note of, and she's a super cool gal ...

Vixen Violette

photo by Henry swiped from Vixen Violette's MySpace page

I'll never forget the first number I saw Vixen perform because it was a pole number. If you've been reading this blog for long, you may recall that my wife is a pole dancer. So I have a special place in my heart for them that do pole tricks.

Vixen Violette is cool. I was trying to think of the perfect analogy, and here it goes: She's Jodie Foster's character in Stealing Home cool. She's the babysitter you wish you had when you were a twelve year-old boy, giving you cigarettes and booze and driving you to the beach in your parent's convertible. She's that kind of cool. A cool that's kind of dangerous, just the right amount of playful, and alluring.

She knows how to work an audience (which, come to think of it, may be part of what makes her so cool). With wily confidence she begins her number. Her musicality is subtle but well thought out, and tended to with nonchalant grace. Each peel and reveal is executed with effortless fluidity. She builds her own costumes, and it's obvious to me that this fluidity is no coincidence. Are you getting the picture? Vixen Violette is the Fonzie of burlesque, and she's way sexier Henry Winkler! Seriously, it's no contest.

She can bring the comedy, as well. Last night proved that, as she appeared separately as Go Go Yubari in a Kill Bill Vol. 1 solo number and Vincent Vega alongside Lux LaCroix as Jules Winnfield in a Pulp Fiction duet. She is a natural comic on stage. Her knack for playing to (and with) the audience is a huge asset in this regard.

Oh ... and she owns Bon Jovi's "Dead or Alive." Nothing compares with the live performance, so consider this just a taste of what you'll experience when you catch this fabulous dancer in person:



Vixen Violette can be seen on the third Thursday of every month at Burlesque-A-Go-Go, the show she produces with The Fierce Lux LaCroix at Mr. T's Bowl in Highland Park. You can also keep up with her performance schedule on Burlesque411.

It seems I've missed the boat completely on my "Artists I Love" series this week.

Ah well.

Expect a double helping next week!

The Building of a Mascot
How I built the Spike puppet

Earlier this year, I joined a few friends in starting a new theatre company. We settled on the name "Theatre Unleashed" and our brilliant graphic designer Jenn Scuderi put together a logo that included a little clip-art graphic of a scrappy dog:

I'm not sure where she found this, but purchasing the rights to it was one of our very first expenditures as a company.

We determined that our first production as a company would be a one-night only "introduction" fundraiser. This fundraiser would be a talent showcase, filled with song and dance and short-short plays and etc. I, as president, would host. Our artistic director, Phillip Kelly would co-host, and we would have "bits" throughout the night.

One such bit involved bringing out a Spike puppet to talk about our educational program. The puppet would argue with Phil, barking "Executive decision!" at him. So I would have to build a Spike puppet!

As much as I complain about not being a puppet builder, I actually do build puppets. It's not my strongest ability, and I frustrate easy when it comes to sewing. Above you see the very first sketch of the Spike puppet, doodled out at my "day job".
I was also taking a film class at the time, and I sketched out the above during a lecture. I'm trying to get a sense of how he will look in three dimensions, and I'm working out his legs. Dogs (all animals, really) have very interesting hind legs. Their knees and ankles are in strange places. It's a very distinct look, and one that I wanted to emulate.
My final sketch, and an attempt to break down the head into a pattern. I abandoned the squarish direction I was heading in, opting instead to use the "wedge method" as explained by Andrew Young on his Bear Town website. Spike's head is a foam sphere. His muzzle is very much like the sketched out pattern above, but finagled a bit as I worked on it. (Here's a bit of trivia: While working on the sketch above and puppet below, I was watching The Dear Hunter for the first time. That's what we call multi-tasking around Casa de Moore!)

Pamela purchased the fabric for me down at the fashion district. I believe it's chenille. It's a stretchy fabric with a wonderfully low, yet scrappy pile. I cut the fabric to fit the foam, and glued it in place. I then stitched the seams together. Oh yes! I first covered the puppet with white fleece. The chenille was a bit see-through, so I had to have a white base underneath. Otherwise you'd see the green foam "skin" of the puppet. His teeth are cut from a sheet of white fun foam. The nose is a black pom-pom, and his toes are white pom-poms.

The spots and ears are black chenille. The eye spot and smaller back spot were sewn directly on top of the white fabric, but I cut a hole for the larger black spot. If you look closely, you can see that the eye spot and smaller back spot are raised and the larger back spot is flush with the white fabric.

His tail is not as long as the clip art (or as I had originally sketched). This was just an aesthetic choice. I think a shorter tail is cuter. There's a wire inside the polyfoam stuffed tail to keep it upright.
The head is much larger than the body. This was another design choice. Big heads are cute (see also Tweety Bird, Jerry of "Tom and Jerry", and Porky Pig).

I never did the hind legs for Spike, mostly because I ran out of time. Pamela assured me that the puppet works without them, but I don't know. I'd still like to make them and add them on.

Another last minute compromise was the collar. As you can see, the collar is made out of red felt and white pipe cleaners, with a black felt tag. I wanted to put a real collar on him, but I didn't have the time to run out and buy a real one.

Spike was well-received at the show, and even has his "headshot" on the Theatre Unleashed website!

I am running out of adjectives! And this is only my fourth burlesque artist to write about. Maybe I can use more exclamation points! Nevertheless, there is much to be said about this week's Artist I Love. She's a triple threat, and always a treat, the delightful broad we know as ...

Vanity Flair

photo by Dan Hendricks, swiped from Vanity Flair's MySpace site

Vanity has one of those smiles that instantly transports you from the doldrums to good cheer. She has a buoyant, effervescent personality that bubbles off of the stage and into your heart. She has a Christmas cookie quality, a sweetness that is warming and joyful. Her numbers are inviting; strangely intimate in a way. You really get a sense that she's performing just for you. Perhaps it's her incredible stage presence or her well-polished chops as a performer, but she makes it look easy, and she makes you feel at home.

Have you ever seen The Sound of Music? I've seen bits and pieces. One part that stands out to me (for obvious reasons, if you've read this blog much) is the sequence wherein the von Trapp kids perform "The Lonely Goatherd" as a marionette show for their dad. That same spirit of joy, of playful creativity can be found in Vanity's burlesque work.

Take for instance Vanity's "Fan vs. Boa" number. She brings to the stage the classic struggle -- which prop should a dancer use, a fan or a boa? -- with excellent musicality. Burlesque musicality is like the old Warner Brothers cartoons, where matching the music is played up for comedic effect. She plays on this musicality like a virtuoso. Her asides are priceless, such as her reaction when she realizes she just hit an audience member with a discarded glove.

She also sings! Her rendition of "Good Morning Baltimore" caught me completely off-guard. Since I'm married to a burlesquer (the diabolically cute Red Snapper) I sometimes arrive at a venue with the dancers, and hang around until the show starts. The night I first heard Vanity sing was such a night, and I was able to sit in on her sound check. In civilian clothes and a picture of perfect professionalism, she ran through the number. That was incredible. A bit later when she took the stage in full costume, with an audience, it was more so.

And she acts! She's a legit actress under her "real name" (or as Red refers to it, her "slave name") but we burlesque fans get to see this talent at play when she -- excuse me -- when her mom, Eileen Flairowitz, hosts at the Monday Night Tease. Eileen is one half of a sister act, The Flairowitz Sisters (with Belle-Mort Baudelaire as Irene) and they recently posted their pilot webisode online:

Eileen & Irene - Pilot Episode

Vanity Flair will be performing at Shimmy & Shake on July 13th, and in the "Burlesque Tribute to Quentin Tarantino" at the Monday Night Tease on July 14th. You can also keep up with her at her MySpace page, or through Burlesque411.com.

Yeah, yeah. It's Friday. So sue me! For this week's "'Artists I Love': Burlesque Edition" we turn to one of my all-time favorite performers, and Miss Viva Las Vegas 2008. It's none other than the very tall, very sassy ...

Dizzy Von Damn!

photo by Laura Creecy, swiped from Dizzy's Myspace site

Yes, the exclamation point is part of her name.

Comedy is a big part of Burlesque. It's right there in the name (the derivation of burlesque is the Latin for "nonsense" or "joke"). With the unshakable logic of a Vulcan, Dizzy takes a concept, finds the comedic germ at the heart of it, and proceeds to rhinestone the hell out of it. Of all the performers I've seen who are based in L.A., Dizzy comes the closest to out-right performance art. This is not to say she doesn't bring the sexiness. Ho-boy does she ever! It just means that when she performs, the genius behind the act is irresistible, so that every hoot is punctuated by a guffaw.

Each reveal seems to have its own punchline. Her "Peek-a-Boo" number is a prime example of this. I don't want to give too much away, but through the course of the act eyeballs keep popping up. And every time an article of clothing comes off (revealing yet another eyeball or two) the response is simply riotous. Her numbers possess a finely focused unity of concept throughout that really set them apart. She speaks a bit about how she comes up with these numbers on a past Burlesque Podcast.

photo by Dan Hendricks, also swiped from Dizzy's Myspace site.

Check out the bra: not just eyes, but they're blinking. So don't get the wrong impression of Dizzy, that she's a coldly calculating comedian. Understand that these numbers work as well as they do because of the personal whimsy she injects. (Does that make her more of a Romulan than a Vulcan?)

Dizzy is drifting in the direction of hosting, which I would love to see. She has an infectious smile and an appealing onstage presence, and I believe she'd excel in the role of emcee. Dizzy can hold an audience in the palm of her hand, as when she takes the stage to deliver her "Off Color Joke" at Victory Variety Hour. And she recently revealed another hidden talent, singing "Somewhere That's Green" at The Monday Night Tease.

Dizzy Von Damn! is a featured regular in Burlesque-a-Go-Go at Mr. T's Bowl in Highland Park, and in Victory Variety Hour at El Cid. She can also be seen frequently at The Monday Night Tease at 3 Clubs in Hollywood. Your best bet is to befriend her on MySpace, and look for performance dates as bulletins.

E2: The Everything Test 2

There are many different types of tests on the internet today. Personality tests, purity tests, stereotype tests, political tests. But now, there is one test to rule them all.Traditionally, online tests would ask certain questions about your musical tastes or clothing for a stereotype, your experiences for a purity test, or deep questions for a personality test.We're turning that upside down - all the questions affect all the results, and we've got some innovative results too!
Version 2 is leaner, meaner, and features a more mature and varied set of questions than the previous test. Enjoy!

Character Traits Analytical 20% Artistic 78% Driven 0% Emotional 50% Horny 71% Independent 0% Musical 82% Optimistic 0% Outgoing 0% Political 100% Religious 27% Romantic 50% Social 0%

Life Experience Criminality 0% Intellectual 100% Relationships 40% Sexuality 40% Travel 32%

PoliticsYour political views would best be described as Libertarian, while philosophically you tend to think like a Conservative.

Socioeconomic Your attitude toward life best associates you with Middle Class. You make more than 69% of those who have taken this test, and 31% less than the U.S. average.

You tend to think more like an artist than an engineer.

Location-wise, you would probably be a good fit for the City.

TAKE THE TEST
brought to you by thatsurveysite

Bizarre. Pammy did this quiz, and I had to take it myself to really understand ... at times it feels like a covert blackmail operation.

I would like to know how it's possible to both have libertarian political views and be philosophically conservative. Not exactly the same thing. (I highly endorse the World's Smallest Political Quiz as the most accurate and most balanced political quiz of all time. Not bad for something invented forty years ago!)

And what the hell do those percentiles mean, anyhow? How is it I score a 40% on relationships? What the hell metric are they using, anyhow?

0% on driven, independent, optimistic, outgoing and social? What the hell kind of no-life sloth am I supposed to be?

I hate these things.

This week's Tuesday's Artists I Love -- Burlesque Edition! is running a bit late, again.

The problem, in part, is deciding who to write about! There is so much talent in the burlesque scene, it can be a bit overwhelming. And not just the girls, mind you ... there are great hosts like Gary Shapiro and Chris Beyond, sideshow artists like Rev. Tommy Gunn, and musicians like Creekbird. Not to mention the photogs and videographers who are doing the hard work of documenting this moment in time for the ages!

Last night Red and I went to Lucha Va Voom! for the first time, so I have plenty to talk about. Oh heck, I haven't posted anything here about my big Weezer Hootenanny experience! So I have a ton of blogging to do.

WHAT WE SHOULD HAVE SAID
An Anthology of One Acts for L.A.

My new theatre company is currently presenting an evening of one acts, and I'm involved in two of the plays:

* At the Threshold, which I directed, is an incredible short work by Phillip Kelly. It deals with something I'm all too familiar with, the unstoppable crash of adulthood into an otherwise happy-go-lucky, young adult life. It's a quarter-life-crisis story that's not soppy or self-indulgent. Nor is it too heavy. I'm a big fan of this play, and I literally jumped at the chance to direct it. My cast is just incredible. Jacob Smith, Darci Dixon, Gregory Crafts, Lisa K. Wyatt, Katie Sikema, and Jenn Scuderi bring this work to the stage.

* Three Small People in Very Big Shoes, which I wrote, is a satirical look at backstage life at Disneyland. It's a sex farce expertly helmed by director Jim Blanchette and brought to life by Jacob Smith, Vanessa Hurd and Ana Therese Lopez.

And here's a deal readers of this blog just can't beat: Mention my name at the box office (or when reserving your tickets on our reservation line) and you'll get half off the price of admission this Saturday and Sunday! Holy smokes, that's a good deal!

I'm really proud of the work we've done, and I want to share it with as many people as possible. Because what's the point of doing this stuff if I don't get to share it?

Details: June 12 - 29 , Thursdays through Saturdays at 8pm, Sundays at 7pm At THE COMPLEX in Hollywood, 6468 Santa Monica Blvd. Tickets: Normally $20, half price this Saturday and Sunday if you mention my name (Andrew) To reserve your seats: (818) 849-4039

And after you see the show, come back here and tell me what you thought!

Here's what Pat Taylor at The Tolucan Times and Canyon Crier thought:

"A 'cutting edge' fearless and talented bunch who 'tell it like it is,' just opened this series of gritty, thought-provoking scenes, exploring the complexities of desire, ambitions, regrets, self-identity, love lost, and the delicately diverse art of communication."

"This is an e-ticket ride into the dark and vulnerable psyche of human nature ..."

(I wanted to post this last week, but life is what happens when you're busy making other plans. Or so I hear. Anyway, I'm going to try to make this a weekly thing, and spotlight a new burlesque performer each week for the rest of the year.)

The Irrepressable
Lili VonSchtupp

photo (by Chris Beyond) swiped from Lili's MySpace page.

Lili is my kind of woman. I likes 'em brassy, and I likes 'em ballsy. And Lili is both, in spades! She's outspoken, confident, and passionate. What's not to love?

There is nothing halfway about this lady. Not only does she perform (bringing to the stage some of the most daring comedic material around ... did you see her in "The Wrong Show" earlier this year?) she also co-produces the longest running weekly burlesque show in Los Angeles, The Monday Night Tease; she co-hosts the Burlesque Podcast; and she manages burlesque411.com, THE online guide to burlesque performances around the world. Oh yeah, she's also a member of the local burlesque photo corps, goes to all the major burlesque events around the country (covering them with the podcast) and she teaches. She's a "Jane-of-all-Trades" and as such a woman after my own heart.

One of the things I admire most is her role as producer. In a past Burlesque Podcast, she gives "a behind the scene look at how the big show happens." This really gives a window into the tight ship she runs along with Scarlet Letter, her co-producer. The Monday Night Tease is seamlessly run, and believe me, I've been to quite a few of them. I think I could count the production "hiccups" on one hand, and attribute all of them to unforeseen emergencies or acts of god.

What's neat is watching her transform from producer to performer.

As a performer, she's all play. I've been struggling with how best to describe her, and what I've come up with is this: Lili is a classic comedienne, like Lucille Ball or Carol Burnett, posessing a "Rat Pack" showmanship that is sorely lacking in the entertainment world at large. If this were the 1950s or early 60s, she would no doubt have her own variety hour on television, (cue announcer's voice:) brought to you by Dewar's finest blended Scotch whisky! She's a class act, even when pouring Dewar's from her bra. She also brings a confident sexiness, an appeal borne of bold self-assurance. And, although she'll tell me to fuck off after she reads this, she's very pretty as well.

If you haven't seen her perform, you have no idea what you're missing. She brings a curious combination of innocence and naughtiness to the stage. Her famed pink poodle number is a perfect example of this. As she chases these little battery-powered pink poodles around the stage (in a perfect interpretation of a circus dog act) her costume seems to fall off on it's own, getting snagged here, torn there. She smiles through each reveal, refocusing the audience's attention on the ridiculous little dogs who fill up the stage. At the end of the routine ... well, I don't want to give anything away. Let's just say she has two final poodles to bring out!

Here's a number I haven't seen live (yet), Lili as "Dead Marilyn Monroe":


She never disappoints, and she always puts on one hell of a show! You can check her out on MySpace or at the Burlesque Podcast.

Innappropriate Banner Ad:

Seen on Hotmail.

"We're not asking for much ... just an arm and a leg!"

This has got to be a joke.

... will be posted later this week. Hopefully tomorrow!

In the meantime, huge congrats and much love to Lux LaCroix, who got First Runner-up and "Most Dazzling Performer" at Miss Exotic World this past weekend!


(It's a burlesque tribute to Prince!) You can read about Lux in last week's "Tuesday's 'Artists I Love'".

The Fierce Lux LaCroix

I'm listening to the Dresden Dolls' "Coin Operated Boy" as I write this. In fact, it was this particular song popping up on my iPod that inspired these words. I can't hear this song without thinking about Lux. She's an incredible dancer and burlesque performer, and I figure since I haven't done one of these "Artists I Love" posts in a while, I would inaugurate a new, burlesque-oriented direction by highlighting this incredible artist.

photo of Lux swiped from her MySpace profile

There is a reason why, when being introduced by emcees all across the burlesque scene, she is called "The Fierce Lux LaCroix." She is a dynamo, both on stage and in person, who can disarm and confound an audience with her energetic stage presence. She has a lithe sexiness, which she displays through her athletic and high-energy choreography. If Lux were merely a great dancer, that would be enough reason to enjoy her as a performer. Combining her prowess as a dancer with a wicked sense of humor and keen aesthetic judgment, Lux never fails to bring down the house.

"Coin-Operated Boy" is my favorite of her numbers. She only performs it in February, just in time for Valentine's Day. Lux takes the stage as a ballerina, dancing with large coin cut-outs. She perfectly captures the wistful whimsy of the Dresden Dolls song, coyly flitting about the stage. At the song's bridge, she begins turning, releasing her large tu-tu-like skirt as she does. The effect is very beautiful and breath-taking; it is both a blossoming and an emergence, and Lux is both flower and butterfly.

This weekend Lux will be competing for the title of Miss Exotic World 2008 in Las Vegas, Nevada. Unfortunately, I can't be there to cheer her on, but I'm certain there will be no shortage of cheers, no lack of applause when she takes the stage. She's an incredible artist and I wish her the best of luck!

* * *

Visit Lux LaCroix's MySpace profile for her latest performance calendar, or check out Burlesque411.com.

You can hear an interview with Lux from the Burlesque Podcast (note: NSFW), hosted by Lili VonSchtupp and Chris Beyond. A couple of updates: Burlesque a Go-Go is currently produced and hosted by Lux and Vixen Violette, and can be found the third Thursday of the month at Mr. T's Bowl in Highland Park.

Here's an all-too-brief clip of Lux performing at Bordello in Downtown LA:

When Red dances, all is right with the world.

She never fails to pick me up!

So Monday night, I left my cinema class and took the bus down to the Monday Night Tease. In class we had this guest speaker from the WGA speaker program. Just an eye-opening talk about what drives us to make art in general, and film in particular.

On the ride over to the big show, I finally had a chance to catch my breath. Life has become rather non-stop as of late. Not that I'm complaining -- I'm happy to have the "problems" that I have right now (forming a new theatre company, looking for a new job, writing a full-length play that I'm to direct this fall, etc.) -- it's just that Pam and I are always on the move. That doesn't allow much time for one of my favorite activities, what I like to call "frustrated introspection."

(The above is an oldie but a goodie.)

After being pumped up by the guest speaker, I rapidly declined into frustrated introspection. I'm not going to bore you with the gory details, suffice it to say that I'm nowhere near as far along professionally as I'd like to be. (That's probably a universal feeling.)

So I enter 3 Clubs, take my seat, and basically stew in my own juices for fifteen minutes or so waiting for the show to start. And then it starts. And my girl is first up. She's doing her "Monkeywrench" number, to the tune by Foo Fighters. And here is pure joy.

A calm descends upon me, and all my angst drops away. Soon I'm hooting and hollering with the rest of them. And all is right with the world.

I'm exactly where I want to be, doing exactly what I want to do, and I'm traveling through this life with the best partner a guy could ever ask for.

I wish I could've found a picture of her doing "Monkeywrench." Alas, the most recent picture I could find is her "Every Sperm is Sacred" number, also performed at the Monday Night Tease a couple of weeks back. In this number I share the stage with Red, performing singing sperm puppets:

See that face? Pure joy!

FTW!*

* for the win

Last night, Theatre Unleashed made its debut. Corny jokes were told. Pretty dancing girls danced. Baby food was consumed.

We met and exceeded our fundraising target for the evening! Our venue was sold out. Most importantly, a group of creative individuals came together as a group, and our patchwork quilt of an evening unfolded seamlessly. Last night heard the final ting of the hammer on this thing we started forging back in January. There is no doubt about it; we are a group. So forgive me if I beat my chest, smile ear-to-ear, and call last night a smashing success. My pride is not for myself alone, but for something far larger than me. Something of which I am proud to be a part.

Pictures were taken, video was recorded. As these digital reminders of last night become available, I will be certain to post them here (and at my other blog, www.madtheatrics.blogspot.com).

Ladies and gents, I'm having the time of my life!

(BTW - the happy looking fellow at the top pf this entry is a puppet version of Spike, our company mascot. He too made his debut last night.)

So. Here we go!

I am co-emcee'ing the event, along with our lovely and talented Artistic Director, Phil Kelly.
This night is going to be either insanely entertaining or entertainingly insane. I'm not entirely sure which. The surprises we have in store ... just you wait!

I can tell you this much: leggy dancing girls. That's right. Leggy dancing girls. And if that's not your cup of tea, how about this: Jim Martyka. That's right. Jim "what girl wouldn't" Martyka. We've got jokes, we've got songs, we've got high art and low-brow humor. This is such an incredible hodge-podge of acts, you'll be begging for another night just so you can invite all your friends and show them what a cool person you are. But alas, this show is going up for ONLY ONE NIGHT.

Folks, you don't want to miss this one. And the proceeds are for a good cause: to help us bring kick-ass theatre to Los Angeles. Some of you, I know, say to yourselves "I'd really like to do theatre, but I don't have the time!" By contributing to our efforts, you become a part of them. When Jeff Soroka's visionary take on William Shakespeare's The Tempest opens later this year, you will own some small piece of that. You can help me bring my original work, Pin-Up Girls, to the stage in October.

So tell your friends. Make your reservations. But most importantly, please come. When I'm up on stage cracking wise and introducing acts, I'll be happy to see a few familiar faces in the crowd!


(And for you out-of-towners, you can contribute, too! Visit www.theatreunleashed.com and click on "Support". Any contribution is appreciated!)

What I've been up to ...



The big show is coming up soon! For more info (i.e. tickets) check out www.theatreunleashed.com!

(one of) My Latest Obsession(s): Suitcase Drum Kits

I'm trying to remember when I first became aware of these things. It may have been on the bonus DVD that came with the Barenaked Ladies' "Everything to Everyone" CD. Drummer Tyler Stewart played a Suitcase drum kit on an all acoustic set, prompting someone (maybe Ed Robertson?) to say, "One day we'll have to buy you a real drum kit."


As far as I can tell, the suitcase drum kit is used primarily in bluegrass/old timey/ragtime music. Also it's used by buskers, due to it's compact size and ease of transport. Here are a few pix:


Dave Harris, a busker from Canada.

The Woody Pines from Ohio. I befriended them on MySpace ages ago. Great sound.

I guess they're used by rockabilly groups, too. This is The Hightown Crows of the UK.
And finally, a great video of one of these things in action. They sound pretty damn good!


The centerpiece (and namesake) of the suitcase drumkit is the suitcase bass drum (or "kickdrum".) (Here's a link to a guy who provides instructions for building one of these things. [UPDATE:  Dead link!  Try this tutorial.)
I'd like to know more about the history of this instrument ... I imagine it was invented by some hobo in 1910 who wanted to accompany his harmonica blowing and banjo plucking friends. I can just see 'em, sitting around a fire, waiting for the mulligan stew to warm up, stirring up a ruckus under a full moon.

Marionettes vs. Hand Puppets

Saturday I performed with a certain children's marionette show (whose name I omit only because this blog is sometimes loose and free with profanity [not to mention links to disgusting videos made by Eli Roth,] and I don't want kids to Google the name and wind up here.) This was the official "coming out party" for the "TTs", and we performed a 15 minute, high energy, all singing-all dancing set. It was very well received! And I believe it will lead to further gigs.

I am by no means an expert marionette manipulator. My co-puppeteers, Mirna and Jonathan, they are really top-notch. I've learned a lot from working with them and watching them. I have discovered that many of the same principles involved in manipulating hand puppets translates to marionettes. But there are some major differences.

First and foremost is the puppeteer's relationship to the puppet. This almost goes without saying, but the implications are quite interesting in practice. With a hand puppet, you are almost always positioned below the puppet. With a marionette, you are always positioned above.

For a tall guy like me, marionettes are instantly easier to manipulate, if only because I don't have to keep my big, stupid head down. How many times has my big, stupid head bobbed up into frame or over the top edge of a screen? Too many to count.

Also, with hand puppets your hand is elevated for extended periods. The blood rushes from your fingertips, your arm gets strained ... it's painful after a while. With marionettes, you're holding them up. Yes, there is still a considerable amount of strain on your arms, but most of the muscular strain seems to center on the upper back, around the shoulders. And you can easily shift a marionette from hand to hand during performance, something you just can't do with a hand puppet.

I find it easier to keep an eye on my puppet and my performance with the marionette. I don't know why, but looking down is easier than looking up for me. Maybe it's because the looking up is oftentimes accompanied by contorting myself to fit under a piece of furniture. Hmm.

The principles of eye-focus and lip-sync are the same. The best bit of advice ever passed my way on eye-focus came from Disney's master puppeteer Jeff Conover who told me and a crew of new recruits to the House of Mouse to drop the downstage ear when looking to the side. This principle applies to marionettes, and is quite effective.

There are some things a hand puppet can do better than a marionette. The big thing is with a hand puppet you have instant control over what your puppet is doing. You don't have to work with (and against) gravity to manipulate the puppet. I can move an arm rod and know exactly where my puppet's hand is going. With the marionette, it's a more delicate operation. I don't know quite how to describe it ... it's like there's more physics involved in the action of moving the marionette's arm.

Although the marionette is far more mechanical than your run-of-the-mill hand puppet(i.e. more moving parts), marionettes have a sublime gracefulness. It's a beautiful artform, and I'm happy to have the opportunity to work in it.

What the hell happened to Seth Godin?

From his recent blog entry, "The Needle in a Haystack Problem":

Google is amazing partly because it goes so far in helping with the haystack problem. Want a part for your 1957 drill press? You can find it on Google.

But Google doesn't help with finding experts when the problem is hard to define, or when interactivity is required. And just about any solution you can dream up has a friction problem: once the system is in place, it will get used too much, by too many questioners, and suddenly it won't be interesting enough for the masses to listen. For example, Craigslist suffers from a decreasing signal to noise ratio (it's a lot less fun to browse than it used to be).

As a matter of fact, Google does "help with finding experts when the problem is hard to define, or when interactivity is required." Pamela and I bought a used Saturn last year that turned out to be more of a "project car" than we have bargained for. It had something wrong with it, something hard to define. We googled the symptoms, and found http://www.saturnfans.com/. Saturn Fans has a forum devoted to interactive troubleshooting of mechanical problems. I've seen where people have even shot video of of their running car, uploaded it to YouTube, and solicited advice on how to fix that pinging noise, or whatever it was.

Google is not a panacea. It's merely a gateway. True, if no one has established a destination, you're pretty much SOL. My Mistubishi's transmission acted up last year as well, and I searched for a forum similar to the Saturn forum. Nonesuch exists.

But hey ... isn't that why Seth Godin started Squidoo? So that people could find and fill those niches? He references this at the beginning of his blog entry, for crying out loud!

You know what I think the problem is? We have grown to expect that the universe of knowledge is 1) one click away and 2) absolutely free of charge. We forget that we live in a world where individuals aggregate content provided by other individuals, and this body of information we call knowledge. When someone hasn't taken the time to aggregate that content for us, well then. It's time to post a bitchy blog about how unfair life (or Google) is, rather than seeking out example of where it's done right, and attempting to duplicate those successful actions to satisfy an overlooked need.

Then Seth drops this gem:

Let's say, for example, I was an executive recruiter. Surely, I would benefit from interrupting every person on the planet to advertise a great new job. But I couldn't do it every day or every hour...

I don't even know what to say. This statement flies in the face of everything I thought Seth stood for. An executive recruiter would benefit from blasting every person on the planet? Even my Grandmothers in Arkansas? My sister-in-law's toddler? The guy who sold me a cheeseburger yesterday?

Weak, Seth. Weak.

Her iz Pipr. Shez not teh Doodlebug. But shez pritee gud, anyway.


moar funny pictures

And now for something completely different:

moar funny pictures
Check out more Doodlebug mania here.

I've been hearing a growing amount of bellyaching over check cashing services. Today, Seth Godin says (in a blog about 'fear'):

• Why do people struggling for an income end up using an expensive check cashing service when the bank right next door will let them have a checking account for free?

You want to know why, Seth? Because you can't put a lien on it, and you can't be turned down if you've written bad checks in the past.

Look, I think Seth Godin is the bee's knees, but this has to be the most ignorant thing he's ever written. His argument is essentially "what? Have they no bread? Why then, let them eat cake!"

When Pamela and I first moved out to L.A., we managed to overdraft funds from two bank accounts. A simple clerical error on our part resulted in a few overdraft fees. We've all been there, right? Add to that the expense of moving halfway across the country, the fact that only one of us had a job lined up in L.A., and the substantial increase in our cost of living (our rent in L.A. was almost twice what we paid in St. Louis.) We resolved the issue, but due to our altered financial position it took us two years to do so.

I'm not saying all this for any kind of pity, but just to show how easy it is to work yourself into a messed-up situation. Our situation was our situation. We took responsibility for it and fixed it. But were it not for the check cashing place around the corner from our apartment, things would have been much stickier.

I think in every case the answer is the same: Internal noise. [I got a few notes about check cashing services, by the way. In many cities, there are banks that have sensible policies for low income customers, and most jobs that use a payroll service like ADP offer direct deposit. The combination would save a large number of people a lot of time and money, and my point isn't that there are enough financial services available to the less fortunate (there aren't) but that if it weren't for a fear of banks, plenty more people would take advantage of the services that are available. $5 a week for check cashing might account for 30% of someone's disposal income, which is a sin.]

I call 'bullshit'. Those of us who have actually used check cashing services, and I would venture to say Seth has not, did not do so out of 'fear.' Many of us did so -- and continue to do so -- out of some neccesity.

And there is some benefit to this. Look, when you're living hand-to-mouth, and your resources are limited, living on a cash basis actually makes sense. You can't spend what you don't have, and you have to keep your priorities straight. "Checking account" plus "modest means" can easily equal bounced checks, and then you're not talking "$5 a week", you're talking overdraft fees in excess of $20 a pop. So god help you if the last item that clears was the one large purchase you made, and the ones that bounce are $5 here, $10 there. I think B of A's maximum number of overdraft items is 7. So in such a case we're talking at least $140 in fees.

(BTW, even banks charge to cash checks for non-customers, $5 last time I checked. This is a relatively new phenomenon, one no doubt fueled by the fact that people aren't idiots, and if a bank will cash the thing for free, why go to a check cashing place? Check cashing places offer other services, such as pre-paid debit cards, Western Union, and pay day loans. I don't recommend the latter, but if the bank won't approve a small loan due to credit issues, what choice do you have?)

What truly astonishes me about Seth's blog is that he is endorsing a brown cow, banks, instead of addressing an actual need, and proposing/seeking out a purple cow: a check cashing place that doesn't suck.

I can see how using the check cashing service becomes a routine, something that some people never break out of. I believe the answer is better education. Remember "home ec?" How about teaching kids how to budget and stick to that budget, and little by little improve a bad financial situation? Teach them how credit ratings and lines of credit function, and how to avoid financial pitfalls?

I'm not endorsing check cashing places. They do suck. They are far from ideal. But when you need them, they're a godsend. A piece of paper with a dollar amount on it is worthless if you can't convert it to cold hard cash.

It's been a busy few weeks around the Moore house!

• Pamela's burlesque career is building up steam. Four performances this month, and her Miss Exotic World entry video to be shot this week. This means costumes, people! I've never seen her sew so much. Our Singer sewing machine has seen more use in the past month than in the [deleted so as to hide our true ages] years since we bought it.
• We've been building a theatre company! Theatre Unleashed by name, and populated with many wonderful and talented people we've gotten to know over the past few years. I'm President pro tem of the Board of Directors!
• The children's marionette project I'm involved in is gearing up for a HUGE public performance. I really love working with marionettes, almost more than hand puppets. I'll have to blog about the differences (and similarities) some day soon.
• I'm still taking film classes! I actually had to drop one of them, because it was interfering with the burlesque schedule. Thursday night is a good night for Burlesque.
• I'm making my burlesque debut this week! Oh, don't worry. I'm not pulling on a banana hammock with one strategically placed tassel. I'm building and performing eight singing spermatozoa puppets, an accompanyment to Pamela's number at Bunnylingus this Thursday.
• I'm trying to get a draft of Pin-Up Girls done. This is a play I've been working on for a couple of years, set backstage at a burlesque show in WWII-era San Francisco.

As busy as I've been, I have had time to grow a moustache:


Then Pam made me shave.